Saturday, July 22, 2006

Triolet Contest Finalists

*drum roll please*

I had originally intended to post all the entries and let people vote. But I got 23 different poems, and it would be prohibitive to post them all, so I picked out finalists and everyone can vote on those. (Special congratulations to Dr. Thursday for seven triolets, and to Kevin O. [don't know if I may print your last name, so I won't] for five. All in one sitting, I suppose.) Anyway, I wanted to warn everyone that not every good poem could be posted. The competition was stiff, because so many people turned out and wrote some really good poems.

All right, here goes: the finalists!

* * *

I am a girl quite simple,
A wife at home with children young.
My daughter has a dimple.
I am a girl quite simple.
I do not wear a wimple,
God said instead, "Here, have three sons."
I am a girl quite simple,
A wife at home with children young.

(by Candlestring)

I asked for heaven for my dog,
I thought it not unreas'nable-
Although I would were he a frog.
I asked for heaven for my dog,
Who never fell in sinful bog,
With sort-of-soul all loveable.
I asked for heaven for my dog,
I thought it not unreas'nable.

(by Leah)

As I was looking for a Church
That was not made of sinful men
Where false believers did not perch -
As I was looking for a Church
I realized, amidst my search,
That there I'd find myself again,
As I was looking for a Church
That was not made of sinful men.

Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner,
My Lenten vows I'm not observing.
I say this grace tonight at dinner,
“Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner!"
I break my fast and grow no thinner
For I have had a second serving.
Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner,
My Lenten vows I'm not observing.

(both by Kevin O.)

I will not write a triolet;
As poems go, they leave me dry.
Not for the Pope, or on a bet,
I will not write a triolet.
And so with some profound regret,
I must your fervent hopes deny:
I will not write a triolet;
As poems go, they leave me dry.

"You'd better write a triolet,
Or else, at least, consent to try.
You find it dry? Then make it wet!
You'd better write a triolet
To satisfy the girl you met
Else she descend in tears and cry.
You'd better write a triolet,
Or else, at least, consent to try."

Alright, I'll write a triolet;
I'll do the thing, don't ask me why;
For the girl on the Internet,
Alright, I'll write a triolet.
In fact, I'll write a tree-part set
To show I'm a determined guy;
Alright, I'll write a triolet;
I'll do the thing, don't ask me why.

(I'm counting these three as one since it's a set, by Furor)

It's called Subsidiarity,
It was invented by a Pope.
It is the only way to be,
It's called Subsidiarity,
With it our spots played on TV:
It will do something more, I hope...
It's called Subsidiarity,
It was invented by a Pope.

I left my verse out in the sun
This triolet is all that's left.
In fading rhymes my lines did run
I left my verse out in the sun
Like cheese too near to Chesterton
My treasure (ah) reduced by theft...
I left my verse out in the sun
This triolet is all that's left.

At ChesterCon I met some friends:
A foretaste of eternity.
A wedding which the wine portends
At ChesterCon I met some friends,
There in the Inn that never ends,
God grant that there we all may be!
At ChesterCon I met some friends:
A foretaste of eternity.

(all three by Dr. Thursday)

* * *

Here's how we'll vote. One vote each seemed a little rough with so many contestants. So, each person may vote for one person for first place, one for second, and one for third. Your vote will go like this in my comment box:

First place - "Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner"
Second place - Furor's triolet threesome
Third place - "At ChesterCon I met some friends"

Or whatever your taste may be. (My votes are just an example: I don't mean I'd actually vote that way.) But please do call the poems by a title I will be able to understand. First lines are good. Also, everyone vote once for each place (first, second, and third). I'm allowing anonymous comments, in case you don't want people to know you're voting for yourself, but it's on the honor system -- you may still only vote once.

Oh, and by the way, sorry it took so long. I had two very long work days Thursday and Friday.

17 comments:

Ria said...

That's a really hard decision, but I think I have decided:

First Place- Furor's threesome
Second Place- "Have mercy on me Lord, a sinner"
Third Place- "I left my verse out in the sun"

That's funny it turned out very similar to the sample list.

Leah said...

Wow, I'm a finalist! How fun. I suppose I shouldn't vote for myself :), so here are my picks:

First Place- Furor's threesome
Second Place- "I am a girl quite simple"
Third Place- "At ChesterCon I met some friends."

Meredith said...

Ooo, so much wit in so little space... yummy!

These triolets are a great relief after reading all that poetry of Joeseph Salemi's, which resembles The Bad Child's Book of Beasts as re-written by Michael Savage. Yeesh.

Anyway... this is my vote:

1) At ChesterCon I met some friends
2) I will not write a triolet
3) I left my verse out in the sun

Number Three won me with the line, "Like cheese too near to Chesterton."

Do you say, 'triolet?'

Meredith said...

Darn! Let's try that again...

Anyway... this is my vote:

1) At ChesterCon I met some friends
2) I will not write a triolet
3) I left my verse out in the sun

Number Three won me with the line, "Like cheese too near to Chesterton." I also loved Candlestring's "wimple" line.

But I must ask:

Do you say, 'triolet?'
Or does one say 'triolet?'
The contest is set:
Do you say, 'triolet?'
Is it like 'sufragette?'
Or is it like 'violet?'
Do you say, 'triolet?'
Or does one say 'triolet?'

Sheila said...

*laughter* It's TREE-oh-let. Isn't it?

I see that the habit of writing triolets is going to stick past the scope of this contest, isn't it? Perfect -- that was one of my goals in the first place.

Another is to "thoroughly understand a triolet," like that one guy in The Man Who Was Thursday. In my opinion, the only way to really understand a form of poetry is to at least try writing it.

Nancy C. Brown said...

First: I will not write a triolet
Second: At Chesterton Con I met some Friends
Third: Have mercy on me Lord, a sinner
Fourth (because I can't NOT vote for this one!): I am a girl quite simple.

Candlestring said...

Thanks for the honorable mention, Nancy, but I must say I like all the others better than mine, too!

First - I left my verse out in the sun (because of the cheese/Chesterton line)
Second - Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner
Third - As I was looking for a church

When do we get to read the others? Do we get to read the others?

rhapsody said...

They're all very good :)

Liked:

1. I asked for heaven for my dog

2. Have mercy on me Lord, a sinner

3. I left my verse out in the sun


Thanks for posting!

Dr. Thursday said...

What a difficult choice! But here is my vote, with comments:

1. Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner

This feels SO Chestertonian - particularly:
"I break my fast and grow no thinner,
For I have had a second serving."

It reminds me of how Maisie Ward tells about how the Chestertons' dog Quoodle would sit and beg at the dinner table until GK would recite the "No more" poem to him.

2. I asked for heaven for my dog

Indeed it is "not unreas'nable": it is even in the Apocalypse: "I John saw a new heavens and a new earth" - and "behold I make ALL THINGS new"... I think of the dance-party at the end of TMWWT...

And also this "With sort-of-soul all loveable" which is so Thomistic - superb to condense the depth of the "animal soul" into poetry!

3. I will not write a triolet

An excellent trio-triolet; there is this very Ted Geisel-like "Not for the Pope, or on a bet" smelling of green ham and eggs...
Yes, there was a typo ("tree-part set") in the third one) but there is such an awe associated with that word, and the strange mental twist from "three" to "tree"... one can understand how GKC approved the printers' error which changed "cosmic" into "comic".

Honourable mention: I am a girl quite simple
I tried to dig up a suggestion to avoid the "young"/"sons" clash, but got nowhere. But it is very good otherwise.

* * *

Sheila, this was a great idea, and we ought to try again, maybe involve the ACS and Gilbert! gang?

Also, I look forward to reading those which did not get into the final selection!

Candlestring said...

Did I miss yours somewhere, Sheila? Surely you wrote one or more yourself.

Sheila said...

I wrote one in the comment box of the original post, but it didn't make it as a finalist. (Can you wonder about that, when I did the judging? I never can make myself like my own poetry.)

Hm, it seems like there's demand for me to post the non-finalists too. Perhaps I will.

It would be fun if Gilbert! did a contest like this. They'd get loads of submissions, I imagine.

Leah said...

Dr. Thursday,
Thank you for the encouragement, both of my writing and of my hopes for Snapper (the dog in question.)

Nick Milne said...

My votes:

1. Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner
2. I left my verse out in the sun
3. I asked for heaven for my dog

Though, to be honest, I actually enjoyed all of the entries on one level or another.

Kevin O'Brien said...

1. At ChesterCon I met some friends - Dr. Thursday and I share the same sentiment about the Conference, it seems.

This is my only vote, though I liked all the entries. Furor's triptych has a Dr. Seuss sound to it, doesn't it? "I do not like a triolet, but eggs and ham I like, you bet."

In fact, the tone in the different entries is quite varied, moreso than you'd imagine the form would allow.

Sheila's mom said...

1. Furor's threesome
2. Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner
3. I am a quite simple

Sheila said...

All right, I find I have to vote, or Furor's threesome will be tied with "Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner" forever. These are my three favourites for sure, although it was hard to decide how to rank them.

1. Furor's threesome
2. I left my verse out in the sun
3. Have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner

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